compiled by the National Adoption Exchange

How to Become a Successful Advocate...

If you are thinking about adopting a child with special needs, well-developed advocacy skills will help you. From your first interest in adoption, through the homestudy and selection process, to the placement of the child/children, it is important that you are fully involved in obtaining the services and resources you need. These advocacy skills will continue to be extremely valuable once you have adopted to ensure that your child receives needed services.

As you travel along this adoption journey, you may find that there are others, such as social workers, adoptive parent support groups, lawyers, teachers, doctors, etc., who will join in your advocacy efforts. But no one will remain as committed or involved as you are over the long haul. You are your own best advocate, and you will have a special responsibility to become your child's primary advocate as well.

To be effective, you must become informed. It helps to be assertive, organized and to keep accurate records. You will need to develop self-confidence and believe that you are on equal footing with the "experts" you will meet.

It has been said that "knowledge is power." Coupled with determination and the desire to provide a loving home for a child, you can become a powerful advocate, and, most important, a knowledgeable adoptive parent.

Tony Apolloni, of the California Institute on Human Services, has identified a model which he calls the "Self Advocacy Cycle" for effective advocacy efforts. This model has four stages:

• Targeting
• Preparing
• Influencing
• Following Up

Targeting

This step has two parts:

1. Identify your need (or your child's need).
2. Identify the service agencies available to address this need.

Begin with the basic need. Example: "I'd like to adopt a child between eight and 12 years old."

Expand it to be as specific to your situation as possible. Examples: "It is very important to me that the child is ambulatory." "The gender or race does not matter." "I need to find an agency that is comfortable working with me as an older adoptive parent (or single parent, gay parent, parent who already has children, etc.)."

Gather information

• Talk to parents in an adoptive parent group about their experiences.
• Find out about waiting children by subscribing to newsletters, reading waiting child features in newspapers, accessing websites on the Internet, or seeing if match parties, sometimes called "matching events," are held in your area.
• Identify the adoption resources in your area. You can call your state adoption specialist (in Michigan, that would be MARE at (800) 589-6273).

Preparing

Investigate your options. Consider as many options as you can and compare the results thoroughly before making a decision. Some steps to take include:

• Gathering brochures from various agencies and adoption exchanges.
• Attending information nights or orientation sessions at several agencies.
• Attending adoption fairs or other public awareness events.
• Asking each agency if you can talk to one or more of their adoptive parents.

Ask a lot of questions. Among them might be:

• What is the agency's time frame for service? Will your name be placed on a waiting list or are there other ways to determine when you will receive services?
• What costs and fees are involved? Are there differences if the adoption is to involve a child with special needs?
• What is the agency's overall adoption philosophy? What is its feeling about older parents or single parents, etc.? How are decisions made about a match between a family and a child? How are adoptive parents' roles in the process viewed?
• What if you are not satisfied? What grievance procedures do they have in place?
• How willing and experienced is the agency at working with other agencies and exchanges?
• Does the agency do interstate placements?

Become part of a larger group. Other parents will provide you with a wealth of information, listening ears, valuable contacts, and advocacy clout when needed. Don't wait until you are in a crisis or a state of desperation to ask for help - establish your connection to the group early in the process.

• Join an adoptive parent support group in your area. If there isn't one, consider starting one.
• If you are thinking of adopting a child with a particular type of special need, consider specialized groups, such as United Cerebral Palsy for children with cerebral palsy or the Association for Retarded Citizens, if you are considering adopting a child who is mentally retarded.
• Don't overlook foster parent associations as possible resources.
• Know your rights. Every state has advocacy offices, legal aid services, offices for the protection of rights for the handicapped, etc. Use these services and learn your rights as a citizen and as a client.

Influencing

Parents and professionals can develop partnerships that will enable them to work together effectively to create and support an adoptive family. You will be most successful in your adoption efforts if you view yourself as a partner with the professionals, rather than just a client. The steps you take early in the process to develop this relationship will pay off later.

Once you have selected an agency to work with:

Build a relationship

• Don't be the type of client who calls only with a problem.
• Attend social gatherings, fund-raising events, open houses, etc.
• Become a volunteer.
• Always be clear and pleasant when speaking about your needs.
• Learn names, especially the names of the receptionist and others with whom you will have frequent contact.
• Stay in touch with your agency at least once a month, more often if a match or possible placement is imminent.

Handle yourself with professionalism. Begin every interaction with either a positive statement or an empathy statement, such as:

• "I understand you have a large caseload..."
• "The information in the packet you sent was so helpful..."

Describe any problem using an "I" statement, not a "You" statement. "I am concerned about the length of time it is taking to get the medical history on the child we inquired about." rather than. "You are taking too long to get me the information I asked for."

Ask for acknowledgment and clarification. "Do I have all the information straight? Is there more I need to know?"

Maintain an even voice tone, eye contact and non-offensive body language.

Offer options and possible solutions. "If scheduling is an issue, would it help if I came to your office instead?"

Plan a time to follow-up. "May I call you next Thursday to see if you have received the medical reports?"

Be accessible. Most social workers and social service agencies are operating on limited resources and are thinly stretched. The more accessible you are, the better service you will get.

• Leave daytime phone numbers and other places to be reached.
• Attend all scheduled meetings and appointments, and be on time.
• If you must miss an appointment, call in advance.

Things to remember:

• Be organized.
• Write down everything, keep good notes, and remember to take them with you when you visit your agency.
• Make copies of everything you mail or turn in.
• Be sure that the information you provide is legible and clean.
• Keep a log of all contacts, including dates and times, nature of contact (i.e. phone call, scheduled meeting, unplanned visit, etc.), names and titles of all involved and any promises made.
• Be flexible with your time. Be willing to take an afternoon off from work; or be willing to travel outside of your community.
• Follow up every verbal contact in writing. Send a letter summarizing your phone conversation or the results of a meeting.
• When speaking to someone who does not have an answer for you, plan a specific time to call back. Do not wait for a return call.
• Always thank those with whom you are working for their time and end on a positive note.

When problems do occur:

• Increase the frequency of your communications.
• Draw upon the support of adoptive parent groups and/or child advocacy organizations.
• Avoid "us" versus "them" conflicts: try to maintain the role of a partner - you and your agency are working as a team.
• Move up the ladder one step at a time. If you are having problems with a case worker, go to that person's supervisor next, not all the way to the head of the agency.
• Use the formal grievance procedures available to you within the agency.
• If you have exhausted internal mechanisms with no satisfactory resolution, get ideas, guidance and support from more experienced members of your parent support group.

Following Up

• Stay in frequent contact with your worker and your agency.
• Celebrate your victories.
• Let others know about what you have learned-share your knowledge.

Things You Should Know About Your Child

Children adopted from the foster care system come to families with a past. Some may have been abused and neglected; others have moved often during their tenure in foster care. Some may have been exposed to alcohol and/or drugs in utero. It is important that parents know as much as possible about the child they are adopting.

Adoption expert Kay Donley-Zeigler, of the National Resource Center for Special Needs Adoption in Southfield, believes that families absolutely have to be given, and should ask for, the following information:

• If the child was in foster care, why did he or she first come into care?
• With whom has the child lived? (This should include everyone who has cared for the child from birth to the present.)
• What were the circumstances behind each subsequent move? Was there new or different abuse or neglect in ensuing placements?
• What is known about the birthmother's pregnancy and the events soon after birth? Was it a difficult or easy birth? Did the birthmother drink alcohol or take drugs during the pregnancy? How much?
• What is the child's complete medical history? (This should include the child's medical history from birth to the present, including genetic information about the birth parents, if available. Childhood illnesses or special conditions such as asthma should be shared. When reviewing medical records, it is important to look closely at the doctor's comments and recommendations, including medical testing that may have been suggested. The results of such tests may provide further helpful information.)
• What attachments has the child formed? How did the child relate to his or her birth family and foster family? Is he or she able to bond with others? Does he or she still visit with siblings?
• What adjustment problems has the child had in the past? How did his or her behavior change when he or she was moved into another home? Which of the child's initial problems are no longer evident? Which still need to be addressed?
• What are the child's positive characteristics? What are the child's likes and dislikes? Does he or she have any special hobbies or talents?
• How does the child react to stress? Does the child know his or her own limits? How does he or she cope with them?

In the past, much less information was available to adoptive families concerning a child's birth family. Recent court decisions have caused agencies to rethink this policy and create uniform procedures about the information that needs to be recorded, from the first person who processes the child when he or she enters foster care, to the adoption worker who gets the case -- sometimes years later -- when it is decided that family reunification is not possible.

Some states now require that specific information be shared with adoptive families. To learn more about your state's policy, contact the state adoption specialist listed in the National Adoption Center resource material.

You may feel overwhelmed when presented with a child's background information. To guard against confusion, it's a good idea to write down whatever the agency tells you about the child and any services that are available to help (a tape recorder may also help, but be sure to get the social worker's permission first). If a problem arises, you can then refer to your notes and review the history. Remember to ask about post adoption services. They may be just what you need if and when a problem arises.

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Adoption Tax Credits and Exemptions Become Law

by Steve Hummerickhouse

Legislation awarding tax credits and tax exemptions for adoptive families became law on August 1, 1996 as part of the "Small Business and Job Protection Act" (H. R. 3448) that raised the minimum wage. The tax provisions contained in the law are similar to those in the "Adoption Promotion and Stability Act" (H. R. 3286) passed by the House on May 10. 1996. The new law includes the following provisions:

Amount of Adoption Tax Credit

The law provides a tax credit of up to $5,000 for expenses incurred or paid in the adoption of a child and $6,000 in the adoption of a child with special needs. Families with annual adjusted gross incomes under $75,000 would be eligible for the full tax credit, while those with incomes between $75,000 and $115,000 could receive a partial tax credit.

If a family's tax bill is less than its adoption expenses, the difference could be deducted from future tax bills. The tax credit could be carried forward in this manner for a maximum of five years. Suppose the Simpson family incurs expenses of $10,000 in relation to the adoption of a child with special needs. The family earns $60,000 in 1997 and owes $2,000 in federal taxes. The $6,000 tax credit could be applied to reduce the 1997 tax bill to zero and the remaining $4,000 could be carried forward into future tax years.

Eligible Expenses

The new law defines qualified expenses as "reasonable and necessary fees, court costs, attorney fees, and other qualified expenses which are directly related to the legal adoption of an eligible child by the taxpayer..." The list of eligible costs for special needs adoptions includes "construction, renovations, alterations, or purchases specifically required...to meet the needs of the child."

Tax Year and Time Limits

The adoption tax credit and tax exemption for employer-paid adoption assistance begins with the 1997 tax year. Unlike H. R. 3286, the law ends the tax credit and tax exemption for all but special needs adoptions by December 21, 2001.

The tax credit and exemptions apply to the taxable year in which the adoption is finalized. Adoption expenses paid or incurred in 1998, for example, would apply to the 1999 tax year if the final decree of adoption was issued in that year. Costs incurred in late 1996, however, will not apply to 1997, the year the law takes effect.

International Adoptions

Families adopting children from foreign countries are eligible for the tax credit and tax exemption only if the adoption is finalized. The amount of both the tax credit and tax credited is also limited to $5,000 for both special needs and non-special needs adoptions. In addition, the tax credit and tax exemption for all international adoptions endson December 31, 2001.

Application

Families may use both the tax exemption and tax credit in the same tax year. Imagine that the Brady Family adopts a non special needs child and Mrs. Brady works for TOXICO, a company that provides $3,000 in adoption assistance. After deducting the $3,000, the Brady's gross income is $71,000 and the family's tax liability is $2,500. The Brady's outstanding adoption related expenses following the $3,000 in assistance from TOXICO amounts to $8,000. The family could apply the $5,000 tax credit to reduce its 1997 tax to 0 and carry the remaining $2,500 forward to future tax years.

The example above illustrates that in combining the tax exemption with the tax credit, a family may not claim the same adoption expenses twice. For example, if employer provided adoption assistance reduces a family's adoption costs from $10,000 to $8,000, only $8,000 would be eligible to be applied toward the tax credit. Similarly, in the cases of special needs adoptions, if the family is eligible for reimbursement of non-recurring adoption expenses, it must subtract the amount of the reimbursed costs from the remaining expenses that are eligible for the tax credit.